Tagged: Raw Chicken Wings

April 24, 2008

I Know How the Red Sox Feel

Dice-K, Varitek, Beckett, Delcarmen, and Coco Crisp all have come down with the flu the past few days. I know how they feel because I also puked today. At first I thought I may have caught something from Josh Beckett when we went pheasant hunting together last weekend, but then I realized it must have been something I ate. You may know that I eat an entirely raw diet (raw goat, cow stomach, raw chicken wings, ect.). Well, it just so happens that my regular raw meat delivery hasn’t yet shown up at my door this month, so I ran out of raw meat and actually had to eat a non-raw dinner tonight. Needless to say, I puked that up. I really hope my raw duck meat shows up tomorrow for the Rays series. I hope the Sox get better too because the flu is the only team that can beat them right now.

Big Pupi

April 1, 2008

Millar Off to Explosive Start

In case you missed it, Kevin Millar is responsible for all the runs driven in by the Orioles thus far this year. In fact, I’m going to make the bold prediction right now that Kevin Millar will drive in 100% of the Orioles’ runs this season. Why is Millar still so great? Well, after losing the “Chowdown” chicken wing eating contest at the end of last season, Millar fell on some hard times. He was starting to believe that he could no longer throw down chicken wings with the big boys. That’s when Kevin gave me a call to help him get back on track. I had been doing a little experimenting at the time eating raw chicken wings (bones and all), so I introduced Kevin to the Raw Food Diet and it was like a match made in heaven. That’s right, Kevin Millar now eats raw chicken wings before every game. He’s bigger and stronger than ever and his raw meat eating is obviously paying off.

Also, while I’m on the subject of Kevin Millar, don’t think I didn’t notice the Sean Casey acquisition this off-season, Theo. Didn’t know you were in the market for an aging first baseman. I happen to know another one you could have picked up instead of Sean Casey. I’ll give you a hint- his first name is Kevin and his last name is Millar. Sean Casey, I’m going to be watching you very carefully this season, you’re already on my bad side. Well, gotta go watch the game, so with that I leave you with my epic poem “Ode to Kevin Millar“.

Happy feasting,
Big Pupi